Friday, July 14, 2006

The man whose arms exploded

I was channel surfing for something to sweep pick to last night and came across a documentary on TLC entitled "The man whose arms exploded". They've had some pretty good stuff on there of late, recently they had some fat week thing, you know, the 750 pound man, etc.. Anyhow, I thought this was about a precision parachuting accident I had seen on TV ages ago. These two guys criss-crossed in front of each other while in freefall and one guy's leg hit the other guy's arm and it disintegrated into viscera. But no, this was about body-building and "the juice".
Not being a BAWDYBUILDER (I say it like that ever since my trip to the Dominican Republic where they had a bodybuilding contest at the hotel. There's not a lot of tall residents on that Island and these 5 foot 1 inch guys where easier to jump over than walk around with all that muscle they were packin) I automatically think that all pros are on the juice. Most TV wrestlers, Football players, all of those guys. We've all known someone who we suddenly see with massive muscles a month after they were regular looking, and it's no secret.

No, this documentary was about Greg Valentino, the man with the world's biggest biceps. AT 28 inches his biceps are bigger than some people's waist size. He took a ton of roids, worked his biceps and triceps like a madman and look at him today! He also got a massive infection in his arm from using dirty needles and got himself into some real health trouble after performing self-surgery to drain two cups of pus out of the area. Then he was busted for selling steroids and lost everything, including his gym, his home, his girlfriend(who he left his wife for) and she died of a drug overdose soon after.

I have some friends who do weightlifting and some have gone into competitions (my question was, "Hey man, who has to rub oil on your butt cheeks? Do you guys all grease each other up backstage or what?") and I haven't really talked to them much about it. I can see that it gets addictive. I'm not talking about roids but working out and self-improvement in general. Most things in moderation are just fine, but this Valentino guy...

If he thinks he looks good like that, he's frickin mistaken. He freely admits to having a Napoleon complex which may have led to his getting huge, but those biceps of his are ridiculous. Check out this TV frame cap of him being led off to jail in handcuffs after they busted him at his gym for selling huge amounts of illegal steroids. If you saw that on TV and had to guess what he was busted for.. Gee.. "Selling roids?" I dunno.. What gave it away?


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